Alas, finals are over.

I’ve finished two papers, moved home from my dorm, and packed for a trip all within the past ten hours. Am I brilliant or am I brilliant?


And my finals begin tomorrow.

Part of me can’t wait to get this done and over with so I can head home and pack for my vacation (flying off ten hours after my last paper ends feels so good) but another part of me’s simply too worried I’d mess up.

Will any saint kindly feed me doxepine so I’d sleep properly tonight and not stay up reading through the remnants of the poetry anthology? Thanks.

“To live without self-respect is to lie awake some night, beyond the reach of warm milk, phenobarbital, and the sleeping hand on the coverlet, counting up the sins of commission and omission, the trusts betrayed, the promises subtly broken, the gifts irrevocably wasted through sloth or cowardice or carelessness. However long we postpone it, we eventually lie down alone in that notoriously uncomfortable bed, the one we make ourselves. Whether or not we sleep in it depends, of course, on whether or not we respect ourselves.”

– Joan Didion, On Self Respect, “Slouching Towards Bethlehem”

I’m sick, tired, and I look like death

I just had to fall ill a week before finals.
My throat hurts, my head’s throbbing, and I could probably fall asleep any moment now, but there’s readings to be done. Not that I’d mind reading Woolf, really – I’m just too sleepy. Rather ironically, the cause of such drowsiness lies not in my flu or my period but the Jessica Jones marathon I ran last night. I suppose I only have myself to blame for feeling like utter crap today – shame on me. On a more optimistic note, I’ll just have to put on some eyeliner and a leather jacket to perfect a Jessica Jones cosplay, not to mention that I’ve got the exactly sleep deprivation-induced ‘tude for it. Smile.

Since I can’t focus on the things I need to get done, I figured I’ll turn my attention towards something else for a bit: this. It’s an interesting perspective, but I’m tired of these rampant generalisations of my alma mater, so here’s my take to put things straight.  Continue reading

Thus concludes all classes of my very first semester of college.

Granted, two weeks remain till the formal end of semester – the end of my finals – but I’ve had my final tutorials and submitted my final essays. I really ought to be studying right now but being home with the family got me awfully excited about our vacation plans. My parents have just announced that we’re headed to Hong Kong the day after my finals for five days, before we fly to Penang for a week, so it’s going to be a rather packed two weeks. Undeniably, I’m most excited about going to Disneyland (despite having been to the one in Hong Kong twice before) for they’ve added more attractions since I’ve last been there, and it happens to be their 10th Anniversary, so there’ll be an awful lot of celebrating going on. How grand!

As much as I’d love to plunge straight into vacation planning, I’ve still got exams to ace. I’m not exactly sure how to go about studying for my history paper since there’s just so much content. Hopefully I’ll get my shit together within the next 12 days.

the penultimate week of the semester

I’ve made it out of week 12 alive, despite my procuring of some battle scars – a caffeine-driven insomnia and these eye bags – along the way. Onwards to week 13. (Who am I kidding?) With two essay deadlines and a presentation due, I’m pretty much doomed.
But I’ll get by, or at least, I’ll get through it. What remains of me after it, however, is yet to be determined.

comfort food+Joan Didion+Grimes' new album

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